Three of my teen daughters are currently ballet dancers, studying that art form in a pre-professional classical ballet school. Most days at the studio, the girls are required to wear black leotards (with or without ballet skirts), pink ballet tights and pink canvas shoes. On Wednesdays the girls are allowed to wear colored leotards, and they fully enjoy expressing themselves then by wearing pretty floral or solid colored leotards and coordinating filmy ballet skirts.
A couple months ago the girls and I were in the fabric store, purchasing some material for my 16 year old, who is taking a sewing class at school. My younger daughter asked for a yard of a couple different kinds of stretch fabric to try to make a ballet skirt. Soon, the 12 year old found the clearance rack, and shyly asked for some material too. Not knowing anything about making ballet skirts, but figuring the older sister could help them all figure it out, I purchased several yards of material in beautiful colors and textures.
At home, the girls went straight to You Tube on the Internet to research how to make the ballet skirts they desired —ABT (American Ballet Theater) style — shorter on the sides and longer in back. My 14 year old worked particularly diligently. She made a few mistakes, had to start over, but before long she had several pretty new skirts to wear to ballet class, and did so as her classmates oohed and ahhed over the new creations. Of course this response motivated her to go home and make more. Some of the girls even asked her to help them make their own, or make some for them with their own material.
As I watched this process unfold right before my eyes, I realized I was watching a pattern that I had seen many times before in my family. Perhaps you have seen it in yours too.
An interest is sparked. You feed the interest by supplying the environment, the materials and enthusiasm. You stand back. They fly.
My 19-year-old daughter is currently a computer animation college student studying art and cartoon animation. While she has taken a few traditional 2-D and 3-D art classes while in high school, she was primarily self-taught in cartooning. When she was a little girl, we simply made materials available to her. I think she filled enough sketchbooks to line our 1,000 foot driveway if put end to end. This daughter didn’t ask for new Polly Pocket toys for her birthdays. She wanted Prisma color markers and pens and “how to” books from the art store. So, we purchased what we could, surrounded her with material, encouraged her and then let her be. She flourished.
This daughter spent hours honing her craft, reading books on her own about illustration from the library or bookstore and then just applying what she learned. She drew and sketched and doodled and sketched some more. She would bring her notebook to baseball games, to the movie theater, to Grandma’s house… Wherever she went, that sketchpad and those pencils came too. To date, she has contributed art for a comic book, had some artwork published in a book, and is now really taking off with her college classes in an excellent program. This all started with the interest, the environment, materials and encouragement.
Something similar occurred when my son was in the fifth grade. We had been reading about electricity in our homeschool and studying electrical current. Out of the blue one afternoon my son gave me a list of parts he wanted: a nine-volt battery, some wiring, some metal and other things I can’t remember. Apparently he had started independently reading an electric circuitry book I had on our shelves and he wanted to make a burglar alarm. Instead of trying to control the project, I gave him the materials, some encouraging words and let him at it. In a day he had made, completely by himself, a working burglar alarm. I doubt he would have done so well had I tried to micromanage him.
It occurred to me recently that this formula, which I’ve seen time and time again at work in our family, can be applied to helping our children develop a relationship with God too.
As parents we can spark an interest in our children to communicate with God. Beginning when they are very young we read them Bible stories, saint stories and talk about God frequently, daily. As they grow older, we feed the interest by supplying the right environment. This is accomplished by making a truly Catholic home, teaching them knowledge of the faith and frequenting the sacraments with them. Next, we provide the materials, (prayer books, saint books, statues and artwork in their rooms and our homes to uplift and inspire). We offer genuine enthusiasm (including our own example.) Then, geared with the necessary tools, they figure out themselves how they are going to make their own personal relationship with God. Like a plant in rich soil nourished by the sun and watered, they grow, amazingly.