Observations on our baptismal vocation
By Msgr. Michael Heintz
Baptism involves a whole new way of looking at things, a whole new way of feeling about things, a whole new way of doing things. This precisely means unlearning other ways of thinking, feeling and doing. The Christian gospel is perceived as paradoxical — almost unrealistic at times — because it proposes a way of life not governed by the virtues so highly prized by our technocratic society: success, efficiency, immediate gratification and control. The Christian gospel is not about success — look briefly at a crucifix for verification. It is highly inefficient, frequently delays gratification and encourages us to relinquish our obsession with control to the One whom we cannot see.
Unlearning ingrained habits of thinking, feeling and doing and replacing them with new ways — this is what Christian spiritual writers call conversion. If this is central to our faith “journey” (to use a time-worn, if not altogether empty, phrase), my purpose is to point out three pitfalls of modern Christian living, three traps into which people of good faith often stumble, three ingrained ways of thinking about things that, in my brief and limited experience, can have very debilitating results.
The first unconverted way of thinking is the tendency to think that we earn our salvation. I think that this finds its roots in our American consumerism and workaholism, as though our salvation is a commodity we can, with the right effort and hard work, acquire and possess by right; it is as though we can somehow impress or wow God by our behavior. Unfortunately, this is really not a new idea, and it’s also a bad one: it’s called Pelagianism, and it was condemned at the councils of Carthage and Orange in the fifth (411) and sixth (529) centuries.
Salvation is not something we can earn, achieve or acquire. Salvation is a grace, and grace means gift. Our task is simply to receive it as gift. I am not suggesting, however, we simply sit back, saying, “I accept Jesus as my Savior,” and think our work is done.
Obviously, this gift of salvation, offered by God in Christ, requires an active response of faith, a response that demands our assimilation to Him who gave Himself for us. How we live, how we behave, and the choices we make are crucial indicators of our response in faith. But it is imperative to remember when thinking about our salvation, that the initiative is on God’s side. That’s another way of saying He has to do most of the work: in fact, in Christ, He has already done so. Our task is to respond to and (more importantly) rely upon His grace, His help as we muddle toward His Kingdom for which we pray and in which, by our baptism, we have implicated.
You see, when we put the emphasis on our abilities, our strengths, our energy, we are bound to fall into one of two dead ends. If we are successful in growing spiritually and in “being good,” we tend to think of it as our personal accomplishment and end up like the Pharisees, self-righteous and judgmental. Alternately, if we put all the pressure on ourselves, forgetting that it is only with His help that we can grow, we are bound for failure; and failure leads to one of the most challenging aspects, in fact the real bane, of the spiritual life: discouragement. Discouragement itself creates a vicious cycle of failed attempts and further dejection, which can lead to despair. We cannot, and must not try, to earn our salvation. Christ did that once for all. We must learn humbly to rely more and more upon God’s help as we grow, slowly but surely, into the image of Christ, His Son.
The second pitfall is the tendency to think that religion is a private affair between “me and Jesus.” This ingrained tendency of thought undoubtedly has remote origins in the rugged individualism that is part of American culture. While religious faith is and should be quite personal, it is never private. That is, our experience of Christian faith is mediated through a particular community of faith. This is why there is RCIA: It involves the whole parish community, not simply Father Smith instructing Jackson.
That is why our children’s first penance is experienced as a communal celebration: there are, in a certain sense, no “private” sins. While perhaps unknown to anyone else in the community, my sins nonetheless have an impact on the community. If I am less a person because of my sins, the whole community suffers, because I am an integral part of that community. Understanding our Christian faith as a corporate or social phenomenon is crucial. Our experience of Jesus is, in fact, mediated through sacraments, which are public and discrete rituals of the Church that bring us into contact with Jesus Christ. That meeting place with Jesus is always within community. And on a very practical level, we desperately need one another: for support, for example and for a shared sense of what is true and good. In fact, Christian hope envisions an eternal life with God that is intrinsically social – it will not be “me gazing at Jesus,” but all of those who love God in communion with one another in Christ.
Heaven is innately social. Perhaps an apt metaphor for hell is precisely the opposite. If original sin is fundamentally self-love, in hell we get exactly what we’ve always wanted: ourselves (and only ourselves) for all eternity — a grim prospect.
The third pitfall is to want to be perfect, right now. Rooted in our desire for immediacy (we are, after all, the culture of the microwave, the Internet, and the drive-through), and our hatred of ambiguity, we want to be perfect right away. This is an occupation hazard especially for recent converts and persons returning from a retreat experience. They have seen the mountaintop, and they want to stay there. Unfortunately, life almost never works that way. And at the first symptoms of spiritual aridity, they begin to feel less religious, less spiritual. After an attempt to become “Mother Teresa” or “John Paul II” overnight, they become disillusioned and discouraged.
It is best, I will suggest, to look at our spiritual life more as a continuum than through “freeze-dried” moments of grace or sin. The spiritual life is about growth — slow growth — and baby steps are more reliable than blind leaps. St. Thomas Aquinas observed that it is better to limp along the right road than to run headlong down the wrong road. He was wise. Realistic expectations about ourselves and others are essential as we seek to live in this world of ambiguity, complexity and imperfection. In fact, we need to redefine the spiritual life from being the search for immediate perfection to a “learning to be imperfect well.” That is why the image of the Church as pilgrim is so opposite: we may not yet have arrived, but we are certainly on our way.
These are but three significant challenges that face us as we await the fullness God’s Kingdom, begun in Christ, but as yet unfulfilled. As we learn to live here and now as members of His Kingdom, sharing its values rather than selling them out, we will, in fact, be engaging in evangelization. I am not talking about the in-your-face techniques of overly chatty people, which are more annoying than effective. By evangelization, I mean the calm, steady and stable behavior of a people who know they have found the Truth — and they love Him.